


Off the leash

by Matarreyes



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Big Bang Challenge, Coulson cannot stand up to authority, Gen, Grant Ward cannot avoid toxic commanders, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Torture, Skye is the best, casefic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-05
Updated: 2014-09-05
Packaged: 2018-02-16 06:19:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2259153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matarreyes/pseuds/Matarreyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ward was last seen by the team being led away by the military. When Skye unexpectedly runs into him on a SHIELD mission, she learns that Colonel Talbot had been loath to waste the specialist' talents and is putting his skillset to a good use. Skye is forced to become Ward´s mission control as Talbot and Coulson decide to work together, and is quick to realise that Ward's sweet parole deal is much darker than he lets everybody know.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Off the leash

**Author's Note:**

> This is mine and wonderful [ paynesgrey](http://archiveofourown.org/users/paynesgrey/pseuds/paynesgrey%20) AOS Big Bang collaboration. Her art for this fic can be seen by clicking [ here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2258196).) Betaed by [Kitty O](https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2485430/Kitty-O).

The hotel was the most high-end, excessive, gilded thing Skye had ever seen in her life. To say that she was uncomfortable being surrounded by stuffed, self-important, and slightly sleazy businessmen would be an understatement. Still, she was rising to the occasion nicely, strutting around in the most revealing, curve-hugging dress she could find. May had scoffed at her and made it very clear that the target would not be swayed by Skye's curves, but the young agent had only smiled winningly at her.

"That doesn't matter. A girl's gotta pamper herself once in a while. We have done nothing but hide and run for months, and we still have to go on missions in the middle of it all. Don't get me wrong, I understand the necessity of it, but I still plan to have a well-deserved dinner there that SHIELD will have to pay for, just so you know."

It was mostly a joke when Skye had said it, and it became even clearer that dinner was not in the cards as soon as she realized that she was late and Julius d'Ethiene – her young, rich, sandy-haired target – had already found himself entertainment for tonight. He was leaning on the bar only inches away from a tall, dark-haired man in a tailored suit, enthusiastically stirring two identical martinis. Skye made her way toward the pair of them in the hopes of making a read on the unexpected company. She was about five steps away when the multitude finally shifted, allowing her a direct line of sight. Grant Ward's brown eyes were warm and happy as he leaned closer to the target, the relaxed look seeming totally alien on his normally serious face. 

They hardened instantly when recognition hit. Skye did not give him time to react.

"Hands up in the air!" she screamed with all the authority she could muster.

Her ICER was out and pointing at him even before he could start reaching for the gun he surely had hidden somewhere. Which he did not try to do, to her surprise. His expression seemed more alarmed than vicious, and more than a little afraid. By the way he awkwardly held his hands as if he did not know what to do with them, Skye had to wonder if he really did not have any weapons on him. His companion had meanwhile managed to knock down one of the martinis and was gaping between Skye and Ward in a truly dumbfounded way. The multitude was scurrying back, leaving an open circle around Skye but still looking on excitedly.

"Get up. Hands in the air," she repeated coldly. 

Despite the fact that she only had an ICER, and that Ward could see that perfectly well, he slowly complied. D'Ethiene was meanwhile proving himself not to be the sharpest knife in the drawer, since he was still hanging out in close proximity to Ward and looking at him a little bit pleadingly. Skye wished he’d move away, but was loath to come nearer herself for fear of Ward engaging in physical violence. That fight, she could not hope to win.

"Police, please stand back," she insisted.

"We are here to make an arrest. This man is a wanted fugitive."

Skye breathed out happily as May forced her way through the crowd. There was a badge in her hand, the affiliation of which could not be easily determined. The trick was to not let anyone even think about looking twice at it, and May's demeanor made sure of that. The crowd moved much further back, finally including the incredulous d'Ethiene, who slowly made his way away from the bar. Ward was left alone facing May's pistol and Skye's ICER.

"Do me a favor and just try to move. I will cave your larynx all the way in this time, I swear."

He was all about self-preservation, it seemed, as he sighed and held his hands up in the universal gesture of surrender. May came up to bind his hands behind his back with plastic binds she seemed to carry everywhere, while Skye held the ICER aimed at his head. Now that she was looking at him more closely, she could see that his tie was half undone, along with the first two buttons of his dress shirt, making the game he had been playing a pretty obvious one. Skye felt sick thinking about it. She felt sicker thinking about the fact that he had done the same to May. The target, Julius, seemed to have come to the same conclusion. He was looking on with a face as pale as the polished columns framing the place, lips pressed in a tense line.

The hotel security was only now making their way toward the bar. Though, to be completely fair, not a minute had passed since Skye had given the alarm. May was on them before the pair of agents could start making too many uncomfortable questions.

"Thank you very much for your cooperation. The anonymous tip could not have come at a better moment. We have been searching for this man for months."

Which was sadly a big, fat lie. No one at SHIELD had even known that Ward was on the loose. They had passed him on to the military after the raid on Centipede. Talbot was supposed to interrogate him and share the information, but as always, he went on ignoring his part of the deal as soon as things had settled. Coulson had made several tries to gain access to Ward, but was rebuffed every time. After a month, it seemed like their only option was to give up and hope the military would be clever enough to keep the traitor locked down. And now, suddenly, they were confronted by the fact that the man was running free, gaining access to Julius d'Ethiene of all people. And by such repulsive means. Skye was glad when May had wordlessly appointed herself his guard on their way out of the hotel. She wanted nothing to do with Grant Ward. Nothing.  
The silence was complete as they drove back to the Bus. Skye sat at the steering wheel while May hung behind, her gun safely tucked away. She hadn't been kidding about hoping Ward would do something stupid. She watched him with the calm intensity of a martial artist studying the brick she was preparing to cleave in two. Ward himself was perfectly still, limiting his voluntary movements to exactly zero.

Once they reached their destination, Coulson himself came out to greet them, weapon hot and face set in a grim mask. The mission had been an important one, but would have to be labelled a bust now. There was no way d´Ethienne would be amendable to their presence, and they would have their hands full with Ward. The only saving grace was that Fitzsimmons were away on a science weekend on their own.

May and Coulson dragged the traitor out of the van, hardly allowing him time to gather his feet before starting to drag him in the direction of the holding cell.

"So SHIELD still impersonates the police and practices kidnapping?" Ward intoned under his breath, struggling to keep up with his hands still bound behind his back. 

"Good things never change." 

He clearly thought that he would be safer now that May was not the one to watch him. Coulson did not rise to the bait. He just shook the double agent mightily.

"I don’t know how you managed to escape Talbot, but I assure you, you are not walking out of here."

"I was running a mission for him. One you have just ruined. If I don't report back by six, he will be very upset. And believe me, you don't want to deal with an upset..."

He did not finish the sentence, as Phil's fist collided with his mouth. Skye had rarely seen the newly proclaimed SHIELD Director in action, but she had to admit he packed a powerful right hook. Ward was a half a head taller than him, but still he stumbled back right into the ladder and ended up sprawled on the floor of the Bus, spitting out blood. Coulson stepped back as May held a warning hand up in his direction, cleaning blood from his knuckles.

"The phone is in my jacket pocket," said Ward through the blood streaming down his lower lip. "Take it out and make the call. Ask him."

Coulson ignored the words, breathing heavily and looking at Skye and May instead. "I am sorry you had to see me doing that." He told them hoarsely.

"It's all right," answered May pulling Ward onto his feet again and pushing him to move up the ladder and into the cell. The rest of them followed into the operations room to watch the procedures on screen. May pushed Ward into the room and entered behind. Skye watched closely while she patted him down once again, this time much more thoroughly. There was indeed a phone on him, and she took it together with his watch, his tie, his belt and his shoelaces. Ward let himself be manhandled rather indifferently, gently sucking on the blood flowing from his broken lower lip from time to time.

"I really have to report back before six," he said when May looked like she was set to go.  
She turned back at that, and very carefully and deliberately wrapped her hand around his throat. With his hands secured behind his back, he was powerless to resist. She pushed him into the wall until there was a clear look of apprehension in his eyes. The resolution of the surveillance camera wasn't high enough to determine the pressure of May's fingers. Skye noticed that Ward was openly flinching by the time May let him go. She then ran her thumb along the veiled scar that was now gracing his neck.

"They took you to a hospital to have an operation," she said. "I would not have been so merciful."

"How do you think he got free, AC? And why didn't the military tell us?" asked Skye in order to take her mind and eyes off the uncomfortable scene. In the past months, she had found herself willingly avoiding thinking about Ward. She had discovered early on that if she let herself dwell on the Agent Grant Ward who had been her S.O., she would quickly land in a circle of whys and hows that would leave her sleepless and itchy and unable to function. If she allowed herself to dwell on Hydra traitor Ward, she would sleep – and be plagued by nightmares full of faceless people, grey walls, thick smell of blood in the air and endless questions about bases, names, alliances, bases, names, alliances, bases, names… May would tell her he deserved it, so she never told May. She hated herself for it, too. For only thinking about the little selfish personal details and not being able to see the big, important picture.

"I don't think we'll ever know. Talbot was probably too ashamed to admit he lost the prisoner. Come think of it, maybe that was why he never let us interrogate Ward."

"Because he wasn't there?"

"You think they let him escape after only a couple of weeks? That would be truly incompetent," pointed out May. She had thankfully deemed her last threat to be enough and had joined them in the observation room.

"I will have to call Talbot eventually, if only to inform him that we will be keeping Ward from now on. I am not looking forward to that conversation. We need Talbot´s goodwill much more than he needs anything from us. It's not like I am in any position to demand answers."

"Do you believe there could be some truth in what Ward said?" asked Skye.

"Absolutely not. Even if Talbot was that stupid, the military does not have means to keep him in check. You can't exactly take a sleeper spy on his word, can you?"

Coulson wanted to review the entire situation a little before making that call, so per May's proposition they set up a Ward-watch in the hopes he would betray some other clues through his behavior. He was at home on the Bus, too, and nobody was feeling very safe with him there. Skye was appointed the first watch. She imagined that would be a waste of time. Ward looked pretty relaxed to be in hands of the team he had betrayed, sitting quietly in the corner and doing nothing. Skye had almost fallen asleep to that scene when she noticed that his head had come up, and that he was eyeing up the camera. A couple of minutes passed before he suddenly stood up and came up to the watchful eye.

"I really have to report before six," he said into the silence. "You don't have to believe me. Just, if the phone rings, make sure you answer it quickly. Please."

It was five minutes before six, Skye noticed. Not really a surprise to learn he could tell time so precisely without a watch. She did not answer – May had been adamant on that, and she had agreed. She looked around for the phone, though. All Ward's belongings were laying on the table by her hand.

A minute before six found Ward free of his bonds. How did he manage it Skye could not have said. She was not aware of looking away, and suddenly there he was, hands free, hitting with his fist against the door of his cell. The thing was soundproof, but the low vibration still carried toward Skye a little. 

"You hear me? Just give me the phone for a damn second; I am not going to kill you with it!"

He hit the door a couple of times. Breaking it would have been impossible, Ward had to know that. He did not really try. As it became clear to him that he was being ignored rather than not heard, he settled back rather quickly. He pressed the back against the wall, slid down to the floor, closed his eyes and limited himself to taking slow deep breaths. Skye had to admit that he looked like he was truly worried about the deadline. This didn't necessarily mean anything, except that he had probably figured that they had left Skye to guard him while the high-level agents were trying to decide what to do with him. He had to be hoping to trick her into opening the door for him. Which she wasn't going to do, of course. But still...

"May? AC? Can you come here for a second?"

"In a minute, Skye."

She did not raise her voice much, and she did not leave her post to look for them, but she was relieved to hear Coulson's reply. Six o'clock came and went, and nothing happened. She considered informing Ward of this fact, with a side dose of smug reminder that he did not trick her with his stupid little plot, but Coulson was there by then and doing so would have been childish. They both watched with identical furrowed brows as Ward sat curled on the floor of his cell, staring blankly at the opposite wall.  
It was five minutes after six when the phone rang. Coulson and Skye exchanged looks. May had come up silently behind them, waiting. Coulson made a gesture indicating he wanted silence and put the call on speakerphone before picking up on the third ring.

"Yes?"

"Report. We will discuss the rest later."

"Colonel Talbot?" There was no mistaking the incredulous tilt in Phil's voice.

"And who the hell are you? You are interfering with an Armed Forces operation. Stand down immediately and report your location."

"This is Director Coulson of SHIELD. I have found this phone on the person of Grant Ward, last known to be in Miami under arrest. We have apprehended him in Los Angeles not four hours ago."

"You have what?"

"He was detained while trying to con none other as Julius d'Ethiene into giving him access to his father's stock of alien weapons."

"Idiots. Pass him the phone, now!"

May´s face looked exactly like it always did, but the sentiment behind was a very obvious desire to pull the man out of the speaker and strangle him. Coulson was made from other material, though. He very pleasantly informed Talbot that he was on his way and indeed marched to the cell, gestured at the prisoner to stand up and pressed the phone to Ward's face. May entered behind, silently pushing the barrel of her gun into Ward's lower back.

"Yes, sir?" said the man crisply at Coulson´s cue.

"The hell did you do, Ward? I warned you what would happen if you blew this mission!"

"We are on speakerphone, sir."

"Well, turn it off!"

Ward's unimpressed look and raised brow made Skye want to erase the smug expression from his face by imitating Coulson's earlier approach. After an awkward pause Coulson nodded, and she went back to the mission room to turn off the speakers.

"Mission aborted though intervention of a third party, sir," said Ward after he was satisfied with the results. "It turned out SHIELD was after d'Ethiene as well. They did not get him, but they got me."

There was a pause in which Ward listened, grimacing minimally at Talbot words. The man did not do discrete. The words were not quite intelligible, but the general sentiment behind the loud volume was quite clear. It was starting to look like Ward had not lied about being in trouble.

"I didn´t think that starting a brawl in the middle of the lobby right in front of the target was a good idea," he ended up saying over the torrent of words. "As it is, the situation might still be salvageable."

Talbot must have considered that, because his next words could not be quite heard. Ward listened attentively with increasingly somber expression.

"Well, you cannot blame them. I did kill several of their agents," he ended up saying in a voice that sounded like a failing attempt at being reasonable.

This was followed by another pause, during which Skye had the distinct impression that May´s was having real trouble not to put a bullet in his gut. Ward either did not notice, or did not care. All his attention was on the phone call.

"Negative. I'd have to go through SHIELD's Director, not to mention the same agent who took me down the last time we fought." Well, that was ominous, if only for its matter-of-fact delivery. "I know my place, but this is far from the best strategic decision. You will have to come here, I am afraid."

The pause was much longer this time, Ward listening patiently with a distinctly unhappy air about him. Whatever Talbot was saying, it could not be good news. As the tirade went on, Ward´s expression changed from unhappy frown into an exquisitely controlled anger that finally morphed into casual absence of any emotion at all.

"Yes, sir. I would never presume to forget. Can I ask you how many times you tried to get my attention before calling me?" 

Whatever the answer had been, it had elicited the first glint of triumph Skye had seen from him since he had been arrested. He smiled shortly and looked around the cage holding him as if he had suddenly scored an unexpected victory.

"That's what I thought. Thank you for giving me a hand. I know how much you enjoy your golf evenings."

Golf evening or not, Talbot boarded the Bus thirty five minutes later, having been brought to the airfield by a sturdy military helicopter Skye did not know the model of. Coulson was once again on the forefront of the welcoming committee. May went to fetch Ward, holding herself as if nothing bothered her. Skye tagged behind Coulson, more curious than ever to hear the truth behind Ward's mysterious deal. She did not believe for a moment that Colonel Talbot, the arrest-first, talk-later man, would be as stupid as to trust Ward. Especially not with the vaguely defiant, borderline insubordinate behavior she had already seen from the man. There had to be a catch for Ward in there somewhere, and she was itching to learn what it was.

"Where is he?"

May brought Ward out to the common area pistol in hand, but it was an empty gesture. Ward was walking in front of her like he owned the place. Now he was in the company of his new supervisor, he was a little more open with his expressions. His actual demeanor suggested that he had the gall to blame everyone around him for his blown mission.

"What the hell happened?" demanded Talbot as soon as he saw him.

Ward just shrugged. "I was about to gain access, but then I got arrested by a bunch of over-enthusiastic truth warriors."

Talbot actually laughed at that. "Can you salvage it?"

"D'Ethiene saw."

"Can you or not?"

"Sure, I can..."

"Then get on it. You have until tomorrow."

"...With proper preparation, a better surveillance, and some backup. I definitely cannot do it alone. Not anymore."

"You are supposed to be one of SHIELD's best specialists."

"I was. And every time I said I needed surveillance on a mission, I got the surveillance. Just as I got the firearms that I said I needed, and not the ones someone with no actual idea of covert ops decided I should have."

"Careful, Ward."

"I told you it would be complicated and it would take time, but after today I absolutely need someone to at least watch the hotel cameras for me."

"I want it done by tomorrow."

"It definitely won't be done by tomorrow. No way."

"Do you really want me to remind you of your place in front of your ex-colleagues?"

Ward scowled, whether at the mention of his ex-colleagues or at the softly threatening tone of Talbot´s voice, but his tone was exquisitely reasonable as he spoke. 

"I will need a minimum of three days to even get back into his good graces, and now I will need for someone to keep his bodyguards away..."

"Because I can do that, Ward. If you need a reminder."

"You can do whatever you want." There was again that underlying anger in Ward's voice, and now that Skye thought about it, she could not remember him using it on a superior before. Not on Coulson, not on Garrett, not on Hand. It felt like some very thin thread of patience was being pulled too tightly right then and there. Was it the real Grant Ward behavior, or was it something else? "It still won't speed up the mission."

"The mission will be sped up whether you agree with it or not."

Ward was staying still in the middle of the hangar bay, facing Talbot. The colonel was a tall man, bulky and overall just big, and he physically hovered over Ward in a way Coulson never could. There was no screaming and no overtly raised voices, but Skye had no doubt that they were witnessing an escalation of a situation that was a long time in the making. She looked at Coulson, searching for clues as to what to do, but the Director seemed to be content to let these two to hash it out.

Ward was the first to attempt to stand down, evidently having come to the conclusion that he did not want to do this in public after all.

"He saw me being taken away." No anger to be heard anymore, just a reasonable explanation, even a little pleading. "It can't be done so quickly; I can't…"

He shook his head once with a painful expression and sort of choked on the rest of the sentence, biting his lip and going silent. Talbot just smiled very unpleasantly, hands firmly in his pockets, and appeared to be waiting. Nothing much happened afterwards. Ward kept very still, not so much as breathing, eyes glued to Talbot's face. Half a minute maybe passed in the impasse, until Ward bit his lip and rocked a little on his feet, as if considering speaking up and finding the idea extremely unpleasant. Talbot smiled again and appeared to be hungrily waiting. A few more seconds passed by, marked by Ward biting his lip more heavily each time, closing his fists and finally losing eye contact and looking down at his feet.

That was when the man grinned for the last time, took his hands out of his pockets and made a slow round around Ward. 

"You were saying?" he inquired mockingly.

"By tomorrow."

"See? I knew you'd find a way."

The shoulder clap made Ward flinch so obviously, there was no hope to hide it from anyone. He was still glaring, but he looked tired all of a sudden, and the anger had morphed into a definitive hatred in his eyes.

"But I still need backup. Without it, it's not even worth trying."

Talbot raised an eyebrow in a silent comment on his protégée cheekiness, but did not offer more words on the subject.

"I'll see about that. What did your friends even want with d'Ethiene?"

"Same thing as you. Head of family is a known French arms dealer who has now graduated to alien arms dealer. Older son is a bit of an oaf, and he really likes to beat up his call girls on a regular basis and is generally way too uncouth to deal with the high end clients. Younger son is too clever to get a hold on, he'd run circles around intelligence agencies even before SHIELD took an interest in him. Julian is the middle kid, sweet and lonely, not interested in familiar business and without hope to inherit it. Perfect point of entry. Ah, and I think they are specifically after the shipment that leaves on Friday, judging by the timing of attempted contact and the specs they had on their screens when they brought me in."

May's face was impassive, but Coulson did not have the same control over his own features. The look he gave Ward as the man casually reported SHIELD's intel to Talbot would have made even the basest of snakes hide in the sand.

Talbot scratched his moustache before gesturing toward Coulson.

"You provide his cover tomorrow, he will get you the intel on where the shipment is stored. After that, stay the hell away from my operations." Everyone gaped openly, with the exception of maybe Ward himself. Talbot did not look impressed. "You can agree and get your bounty, or you can disagree and get arrested for interfering. It's your call."

Coulson still had not said anything, but clearly men like Talbot took silence for agreement, as he nodded once, patted Ward condescendingly on the shoulder once again and turned to go.

"There is your backup. You have until tomorrow. Play nice or else..."

Ward sort of nodded, eying the Bus and its occupants with the dawning understanding that he was being left in their company for the time. He wasn't liking this new arrangement in the slightest, Skye could tell. The point of backup was to have a trusted ally at one's back, not a bunch of betrayed ex-colleagues.

"What was it, boy?" Talbot grumbled from the entrance. "You belong to the military now, lest you forget."

"Sir, yes, sir," muttered Ward, trying and half-failing to force the due respect and lose the anger from his voice.

And just like that, Talbot was gone and Ward was left standing in the middle of the Bus surrounded by his former colleagues, all of which were looking at him with identical expressions of disgust on their faces. May didn't say anything, as Skye knew she wouldn't. She deferred to Coulson on that one, and Coulson had just been pressured into a very unpleasant deal. He wasn't going to resist Talbot, though. SHIELD was still an illegal organization that was being hunted down, and with the military now knowing where they were, there was nothing the new Director could do. The primary objective of Skye's mission had been to rig d'Ethiene with a mic and listen to a family reunion he was set to attend in the afternoon. The reunion had come and gone by now, and they were still in the dark. The father was moving a big weapon away from California on Friday. Rumor had it, it was a second Destroyer gun, only with a more powerful edition. SHIELD wanted to take it off the streets, and Skye agreed. It was only fair, since they were responsible for designing it and putting it on the streets in the first place.

Now, the military was apparently after it as well. Ward had another angle altogether, clearly, so maybe his window of opportunity hadn't quite closed yet. It certainly looked like it would exist until tomorrow. Except...

"What does Talbot really want, if he is OK with giving Coulson the weapon?" she asked, frowning. Ward's humourless grin went long ways to communicate that he wasn't going to disclose that information. "Yeah, OK, fine, we aren't on the same side now. Like I was likely to forget. Don't look so smug at having found yourself a new master. You can walk free now, but nothing will change what you are."

That seemed to take some of the shine out of his eyes. He shrugged and moved, really slowly, to take possession of the phone that was still lying on the counter by May's side.  
"I have a very specific skill set. As long as there are people interested in that skill set, they will come after me with their offers. Some are more generous than others, but they all come down to the same in the end." He looked at Coulson. "You may have noble intentions, but nobody else does. People like Talbot are a dime a dozen. You were very naïve to think I would stay in prison forever."

"When are you planning on double-crossing him?" Coulson asked impassively. 

"I am not," was an even reply. "We have an understanding. It was difficult to come to one, but in the end we both know where the cards lay. Now, back to the mission. The time window is rather unfortunate. I will need May to do a little acting part first thins in the morning, and for the hotel security and the bodyguards to be kept away long enough for me to have a chance to speak to Julius tomorrow morning."

"What are you even planning on telling him?" Skye asked. She seemed unable to let it go, feeling the need to taunt Ward out of his emotionless professional stance and into a guilty confession. "That you are a backstabbing liar who backstabbed and lied?" 

"You were going to use him in exactly the same manner, and not even give him a nice memory in return," he answered smugly, knowing perfectly well that he had her at that one. Skye fumed, but decided she was too good a person to retort with a jab at him essentially whoring himself. "He is at a family dinner right now. Your further cooperation is not necessary till tomorrow. I will sleep in the cell, you can block the door if you want; it doesn't matter to me as long as I am out of there by six in the morning."

His bunk was still free, his few belongings having been thrown away after the Hydra reveal, but he never paused even to get a pillow or a pair of sheets. He just went into the cell, closed the door behind himself, settled on the floor in the farthest corner and closed his eyes as if going to sleep. May secured the door almost immediately, and set up the security footage. Nobody was required to watch this time. Skye still came by a couple of times before settling for the night, just to make sure it wasn't a trick of some sort. She had the impression that Ward was sleeping. It shook her to notice how peaceful he appeared laying curled on the cold, hard floor of a completely isolated metal box. His face and body looked completely relaxed, like it was the first deep, uneventful sleep he had had in ages.

***

"Hey." The voice was a little scratchy; a not-quite-ideal connection of the mic planned for the target and now being worn by Ward made it hard to distinguish the nuances of the conversation. "Julius. Can I...? I just wanted to apologize for the ugly show. I did not want you to think... I mean, I just wanted to say sorry. Picking people up at bars while on parole is a shitty thing to do. I should have known May would come after me, she always does. So... On the off chance it makes you feel any better, I really am sorry I ruined your evening. And thank you for not calling the security right now and giving me the chance to apologize. I will be out of your hair from now on. Have a nice day."

There was a minute pause, during which Skye thought that Ward's fairly obvious ploy would not work. It did sound like grasping at straws. But maybe he knew the mark better than she thought, because after a while d'Ethiene answered.

"You did not pick me up at a bar." He sounded like he was speaking from a little away, and Skye had to strain to listen. Hacking into the cameras that covered the lobby was taking a little time, not because it was inherently difficult but because there were too many and she didn't know which ones to look at. She was trying to pick up the security detail as well, and block their communications. Ward had told her not to interfere unless he specifically asked her to, giving her the impression that he could handle it himself and only wanted an extra reassurance. "We have been meeting and talking in the bar and in the garden and in the restaurant for two weeks." 

The voice was becoming clearer. Was he nearing Ward? Skye continued searching for the right camera and made a note for Coulson to follow up on what had happened in the d'Ethiene household two weeks prior. Apparently, Talbot's operation was much more calculated and precise than it had sounded. And he was definitely after something different, as the intel on the Destroyer gun only appeared four days ago.

"Why were you targeting me, and why were you arrested? The security will throw you out, make no mistake. I just want some answers on my own, first."

"I wasn't arrested, I was detained. There are certain kinds of people I cannot talk to, and certain kinds of places I cannot go. My parole officer thought I was trying to con you. I am surprised she hasn't contacted you about me yet, to warn you and to make sure I did not talk you into any funny schemes."

May had already made the call by then. She didn't establish any personal contact, but she had spoken to the office, presented herself and asked for a meeting with Mr. Julius d'Ethiene to discuss a recently neutralized threat to his personal accounts on behalf of the US Treasury. The man clearly wasn't going to mention that, though.

"You are a swindler," he assessed coldly.

"A market analyst, actually. A not-very-honest one. I did my time, though. Didn't escape from prison or anything. Just, should not have been here."

"You knew who I was."

"No offence, but I keep up with the trade, not the society gossip pages. You are not exactly big on that front." 

"So you are going to pretend you didn't want to con me."

"I don't know what you want me to say." 

"Try the truth. I am not an idiot, Grant. I may not be in the thick of the trade, but I know how to protect myself. You'd never come close to me, the moment you started talking about money I would have you thrown out of here."

"Which was why we only talked about politics, languages, and drinks."

That was the moment Skye finally got them on camera. They were standing to the far side of the hall, not quite hidden but also not attracting attention as of yet. There was a little distance between the both of them, the bodily language of the target clearly confrontational. Ward was leaning back, managing to make himself strangely unassuming and not threatening. He still had his clothes from yesterday on, rumpled as they were.

"By the way, is it even your true name?"

"Grant Douglas Ward. Ask May. I wasn't working you. I never did anything to you, or else she'd have never let me free. I was… bored. You were there. I showed off my French... Truth be told, I would have hightailed the hell out of here had I known who you were. I do not enjoy being towed around in handcuffs. Had had enough of that for the rest of my life. Made the deal so I'd not have to, anymore. A leash is a leash, but some are longer than others."

"You are not allowed into high end hotels as a term of your parole. What were you doing at this hotel?"

"May had a job for me. I was waiting for the right people to turn up. They didn't, though. She is pissed."

"What do you mean, had a job for you? You said you were a felon."

"I got a deal. They let me out after only a couple of months into a very long sentence. I got to spend my life working for the good guys, now."

"Why?"

"Because I am that good. So they figured, they'd rather use me than let me rot. I am doing the same thing I did before, but for the Treasury. Conning people, running schemes. They watch me at all times."

"How?"

"They have their ways. You are safe, I promise."

"Of course I am safe, I am not a kid. Are they watching you now? Were they before?"

"That… would be beyond humiliating. No. May would not do that. Hopefully. I don´t really know. Look. I only came here to apologize. Can I go now?" The answer wasn't coming, so Ward shifted a little. Skye got the cue and started to search for the nearby cameras. She could not see anyone from d'Ethiene entourage about, but Ward´s nod had given her a clear direction. "Please. I've been doing everything they have been asking, but if you make noise about this? You family is important enough that the Treasury may back off on the deal. It was an honest mistake, I swear."

The answer still wasn't coming, so after waiting for a couple of moments Ward turned around and started to walk away. He was moving quickly, too. The other man looked at his retreating back before nodding. The gesture was evidently directed at someone off screen, who took it to mean that Ward wasn't allowed to leave after all. Ward, proving himself to be the excellent actor they had not known he was until he had turned on them, all but froze at noticing this and turned around to d'Ethiene fearfully. The other man came a little closer, considering him with single-minded attention.

"You look like you've slept on the floor."

"Cot."

"Being dragged out of here yesterday had to be pretty humiliating."

"Is there a reason behind this question?"

"Answer me. Was it?"

"It's not like I have any right to pride. Look. You want your people to give me a lesson for daring to make eyes at you? Go at it. I don't care. Just don't tell May I started it."  
"Do you even swing that way?"

"You think I pretended to... Great. I don't know if you realize it, but for a straight guy to feign gayness? A pretty traumatic thing to do. Definitively not worth the pleasure of your company."

"Well..."

"I told you I was sorry! What else can I do? I could have gone home after they freed me, I just felt like shit thinking you would be left imagining I tried to use you. I just wanted to… whatever. And I realize that you belittling me is fair after the shit I pulled, but maybe give me a time limit. An hour? Two? Because I already have one lifetime to serve off, I don't have another to give you."

There was a long pause, during which Skye stared at the monitors and scratched her head. Ward was scarily good at playing the slightly harassed victim, she had to admit. It looked natural. What she did not understand was how he could expect anyone to fall for that crap instead of turning tail and running in the opposite direction. Ward's betrayal hung heavily upon her, she could not imagine herself ever wanting to give him a second chance, no matter how pathetic his excuses or his sob story were.

"One drink and your full story. That's your time limit. Then you walk away and never come close to me again."

Ward all but slumped dejectedly, which was good acting considering he had just got a foot in the door, then followed d'Ethiene away from the cameras. There was a long chunk of time when nobody said anything. From the background noise Skye figured that they had moved to the bar where all of this had begun. Another while passed as she worked on finding a new cam, while Julian asked for drinks and politely discussed the pros and cons of serving lime and olives together with a Martini. Ward did not say much, but it did not deter the other guy from talking. Skye was beginning to like him, to be honest. He was a no nonsense kind of person, but he didn't seem needlessly cruel. After the initial outburst he had not said one mean thing to Ward. Skye knew that she wouldn't be able to do the same.

How Ward, the least easygoing person in the world, managed to befriend him was beyond her. And there was this other matter to reflect on. Befriend was not the word. The unbuttoned shirt, the liquid warm smile... Julius was outspoken about his preferences, and if Coulson had a male specialist currently on the team, Skye was sure that said man would have been working the target instead of her. A couple of points could be won that way, and SHIELD wasn't above ignoring it, but Coulson would never stand for anything more than a nice smile and a pat on the back. Ward seemed to have another game altogether. His earlier comment on straight guys not being able to feign it made Skye feel sick. She didn't want to think about using one's body that way. She would rather have stayed in prison than accepted this job from Talbot, if it involved something like that. There were things you just couldn't give away. Your soul, your mind, your body. Ward seemed to have no claims about freely dispensing that and more at his own convenience.

"You never had the chance of trying out your drink."

And there they were, at a small lounge table, comfortably leaning back in their seats. Well, Julius was leaning comfortably, while Ward sat on the very edge on his seat. Skye watched him wrap his hand around the glass dutifully, taking a large gulp and putting it down. The security detail had made itself scarce and was hovering near the entrance. They were just two guys, square but not really muscular, and Ward would take them down with his pinky while blindfolded, but that was not the point of this exercise.

"So, what do you want to know?" he said instead.

"Everything, step by step."

"I got caught scamming. It was a pretty big scheme. Been readying it for years. Ever since I got employed at the company. Even before then. Then executed it, and everybody was still none the wiser. The company was already under heavy scrutiny, though. Losing actives. They had been doing shitty investments since the Second World War. Weren't going to recover, so it's not like I single-handedly brought them down. Still, the department I was a part of? They got hit by what I did. Hard. Everyone was extra suspicious, so in the end they figured it out."

"Why did you do it in the first place?"

"Thought it would be cool, to fool everyone. Show them I was cleverer than everyone around me." Ward's tone got dark and poisonous. "Brilliant, thrilling, funny. Thought I'd get as much money I could and retire to Tahiti..."

Skye was listening but not quite looking, mostly because she was too repulsed by the answer as to look. It was pretty evident what the story Ward was spinning was based on; she supposed it was a good strategy to avoid messing up facts and timelines. The cavalier answers were hard to digest, though. So she pressed her hands to the table and fixed her gaze on them. That was why she missed the exact moment. There was a sound of a chair being moved, and a sharp hit of flesh on solid surface. 

When she looked she realized that Julius had stood up and was now towering over Ward, having just slapped his hand against the table with a force that made the glasses move around. Skye tensed, waiting for an immediate retaliation from the specialist, but there was none. Ward was too well trained for it, it seemed. He just shrunk deeper into his chair and glared. 

"Now again, and this time truthfully."

Ward glared again but did not protest, opting to take another generous swing of his drink. And then another for good measure. He was being a tad too enthusiastic about it, in Skye´s opinion. It was good acting and added nicely to the overall picture he was spinning, but he wasn't exactly emptying the liquor into the bush behind his seat.

"It's a long story, you know," he offered at last.

"I have nowhere to be, except at a concert I am really not interested in. Go on."

A pause followed, a very long one. Uncomfortable, though Skye could not tell why it seemed that way. Ward opened his mouth as to speak, then closed it. Made to take hold of his drink, only to find that the glass was empty. A wordless gesture from Julius later he was passed another drink. All in all, he was making a good play at indecision, while stalling for time while thinking up his cover. Skye could use the practical lecture later.  
"OK. I had... My family... I had two brothers, older and younger ones. A sis. Nicest parents one can imagine. They went to movies. I was made to stay at home. A fuel truck went off the road in front of them. Five people, gone. I was sixteen. Didn't deal well with it. Didn't deal, point. Started drinking, getting in trouble. Traded social services for juvie in three months' time. Was facing arson charges from a night trip to a gas station for booze gone terribly wrong. Dad had a hunting partner. John. I did not even know him all that well. They just sometimes went on trips together. But he showed up in the juvie one day. Asked if I wanted to come with him. Said if I said yes, he'd vouch for me, take me in. He didn't have to. I mean, I wouldn't have vouched for myself right then. But he did."

"He worked for Cyberbank, a middle rank employee. Got a decent salary; we made by just fine the first years. When I was old enough he got me a job there, too. But he was ill. Had cancer; was operated early on, got chemo, got radio, was operated on again. It would go away for a little while, but it always came back. So one day, he told me he was laying ground to pull some funds from the company, if it ever got bad enough and he didn't have enough money for the third operation. I was OK with that. Never gave it another thought, just started to help him lay the groundwork. Never mislaid a dollar, though. Always hoped it would not be necessary. But in the end he got bad, real fast. It all went to hell, he was dying, only months left. And there was this therapy, it had just worked a literal miracle on this other guy he knew. But it was a clinical trial, they weren't offering it to anybody else. John found a guy who'd smuggle him a dose. The guy wanted a load of money. So I just took it. Don't get me wrong; I knew what I was doing. I knew I was helping to ruin a company that was already almost ruined. I knew I was screwing the people I was working with. I just figured... If John got to live, even if they caught me, it would be worth it. I was just terrified that he'd die too. They figured it in the end. Not because the transactions were suspicious, but because I was all over the place, I guess. And because of how John was acting... My supervisor called the police, they came to the office and that was it. Handcuffs on."

On screen, Ward pulled the glass a little closer, played for a second sliding it from hand to hand on the table, then emptied it in one long swallow.

"Wanna know what the real kicker was? I got outed, John got outed, and we were already in custody, but... He had his drug. And everything could be going to hell, but I was so freaking happy about that. And he started doing weird things. Talking about secrets of the universe, all kind of crazy. Unexpected reaction to the drug. In the end he just stood up, went through the door and killed the first person he could find. Just... Killed them. Banged their head in. They shot him down after that. I was in the next room. Didn't see it. Didn't see the body. Whatever. They took me away, said if I went to trial, I'd get life for it. Or worse. Said if I cooperated, they'd make a man out of me. Someone useful. So. That's it. That's the story."

"How long do you have to work for them?"

"I don't know. Until I am useful, I figure, which hopefully is long enough, because I really don't want to go back to prison. If that was always going to happen, I would rather have stayed there when I was a teen. At least then I wouldn't have hurt all these people."

"You don't know the terms of your own deal? Did you even get a trial or did you sign on before that? Wait, did you discuss it with a lawyer? Because you sure as hell don't get life for a scam scheme." 

"You don't get it. It was worse than that. The guys I was working with... Well, one guy and two girls... The guy actually thought it was his fault when everything went down. Got so desperate thinking it, he tried to jump off a bridge. One of the girls... His girlfriend... She tried to stop him. They both went overboard. She got off somehow, he was still in hospital last time I heard and nobody knew if... I knew he was not well. He talked about it with me. I thought... I could have come clean, but I thought... I figured it’d just sort itself somehow."

The silence that followed was of headstone quality, pressing against one's chest, a deep throbbing ache that Skye was curiously grateful to share with the two people she was listening to.

"He is in a hospital right now?"

"I don't know. It’ s not like I get regular updates."

"And the rest of your colleagues? The supervisor who arrested you?"

"They still work together, just on a smaller scale. Trying to restructure the company. They always worked well together, and they are all friends."

"Were you? Their friend?"

"I have been falsifying accounts behind their backs ever since I got to know them. Not a real base for friendship."

"But you liked them."

"Yeah."

"And they liked you."

"I don't know. I never... Never really had time for that. It seemed too complicated, and I had to take care of John."

"And you don't have any family left."

"Not really."

"Have you even talked to anybody since you got caught? And by talked I don't mean get interrogated. Just talked, like you are talking now. Explained why you did it."

"It doesn't matter why I did it. And I really do not like to talk."

"But did you? Did anybody sit you down and talked with you about your John? His death, his burial, your life with him, that kind of things?"

"Yeah. Once."

"What did the therapist say?"

Ward´s voice should have been bitter by then. It wasn’t like Julius didn’t have a good point. Everyone deserved a chance to figure themselves out, but Skye could not imagine Talbot offering Ward a scheduled psych evaluation and a points-for-good-behaviour program. But it wasn´t. It was small and wondering and sounded like he was parroting back something that he had learned by heart but didn’t have enough conviction to believe in.

"It was my supervisor, sending me off to jail. He said that I was very lucky that John was dead. That I should have been thinking for myself instead of following his lead. That I should use my prison time to try to figure out who I was without him. I guess it was fair."

"It definitely was. But was it helpful? Do you know where to start?" No answer came, and the resolution of the camera wasn't good enough to pick if Ward had offered a gesture in return. "Do you miss him?"

That earned a chuckle that the mic picked up beautifully.

"I am pretty sure I am not allowed to."

"But do you?" There was a low sound, like a breath that got caught inside a chest and stuck there, forced to stay down and never see the light of day. "Who have you actually talked to in the last month, apart from prison functionaries, Treasury functionaries, your marks, and this May woman?"

Ward actually laughed at that.

"Look. It's fine. Really."

"Did you talk back to me that first day because you liked me, or because you didn't want to be alone?"

Ward laughed a little more, a ragged, broken sound. Skye guessed that it had to seem very funny on his end. His mark was trying to get him to confess that Ward picked him up because he was either smitten or lonely. It did not mean that it was a professional thing to do, laugh like that. Ward seemed to rein himself in quickly enough, breathing deeply and sighing.

"I think I´m pretty drunk, sorry. On a martini at ten in the morning, too. Truly disgraceful."

"Not eating breakfast will do that to you."

"Sorry again. Well, that was pretty much the gist of the story. Gotta go now."

He made to get up, but was pulled right back by a suddenly pissed-off Julius.

"Sit down. You are not going anywhere."

Skye could not help but agree. Things were proceeding nicely, but making this feint was too risky. Chances were, d'Ethiene would just say his goodbyes and let him leave. Ward had to make sure that he stayed, and not only stayed but got access to the private quarters at the top of the hotel. And Julius didn’t look like the kind of asshole who would want a fairly drunk companion in his bed, that's for sure. 

"Sure am," drawled Ward mockingly, getting up and pushing Julius away from himself rather aggressively. "Your bodyguards aren't here, and all those gym muscles on you? I bet you never laid a punch on another loving soul."

That phrase didn't belong in the mouth of Grant Douglas Ward, disgraced conman, drunken or not. It was a Grant Ward, specialist-about-to-fuck-up-a-crucial-mission-for-a-complex-amount-of-reasons, phrase. Skye got hold of her microphone.

"Pull yourself together," she hissed. "You have to stay with him. Sit down and stay put right now."

There was no answer to that, thankfully, but Ward did as he was told.

"Sorry, I forgot my place," he offered as an explanation. "What else do you want to know about me now?"

"I want to know what were you are planning to do right now after you walk away from this bar."

"Like, literally? I don't know. Wait for my next mission. This one was a no-go; hopefully May won't be angry for too long."

"Do you feel like you can take on another mission?"

"I have to, haven't I? You know what they say about beds. Lying in them? Not optional. Gotta soldier on. And maybe I can become a decent person sometime down the road. Though I don't see how I am supposed to do that if I keep on swindling. Like, is there a right swindling team and a wrong one? But that's what Coulson said. Well, not exactly. He actually said he hoped I would be truly miserable for the rest of my life. But he caught others before, and to them he always said he hoped they would learn and try to be better. What do you think? Sometimes I figure, if I fake being a good person long enough, it might rub on?" 

There was another silence for a while, during which Julius took hold of what was left of Ward's drink and downed it himself.

"My family are a bunch of fucked-up people, let me tell you. But, they are there, and I appreciate that. Even though I know for a fact that Father wishes Mother had taken her prenatal vitamins on the off chance that that had something to do with her giving birth to a queer baby. And even though I sometimes wonder if my dear baby brother plans to have me killed sometime. But, again, they are there. So, come on. On your feet."

"Where do you want me to go?"

"Not back to your place, if even you have one. That's for sure. Up to my room."

"I don't want to have sex with you," Ward said darkly. "If you try to pressure me into it, I will tell May. She is a woman, she may listen."

"Wow, thank you for such an act of faith. Just so you know, I am not thinking about sex when I look at you now. I just wonder if there is a chance you might be acutely suicidal. Which is a big turn-off."

"I am not."

"Are you sure?"

"Sure. It would be a weak thing to do, and John hated it when I was behaving like that. And I have to make up for everything." He was slurring his words, not much but enough to know that he was pretty far gone by now. "And I would hate to leave a mess behind. I´ve always felt sorry for the people who had to clean up after me. All that blood, it's a bitch to get off. If I was going to end up like that, I could´ve pulled the trigger fifteen years ago. Except then I would´ve gotten a forest grave. Would´ve been nicer, I guess."

"Ward, get a hold of yourself right now," hissed Skye.

At that point, she wasn't even sure who was siding with whom. If she and Ward were working against d'Ethiene, or she and Julius were trying to keep Ward from unravelling.

"As I said. You are coming with me. You are getting a nice cold shower and you are sleeping this off. Alone. Then, when you wake up, we are having breakfast upstairs."

He went around the table and pulled Ward onto his feel. The former agent swayed slightly, looking completely done for and not exclusively in the alcohol addled sense. He looked exhausted, and raw, and as broken as he had been when he had latched onto Skye after the two pieces of the Berserker staff had fallen out of his hands.

"Why?"

"Because I still don't know if you tried to swindle me or not. Just as I don't know if you are truly suicidal. But I will be damned if I overlook the second worrying about the first. If you are doing this to con me? Congratulations. You won. You can saunter off with my money as soon as I turn my back to you. You can tell anyone about it, doubling with laughter. I don't care. Have at it. Money, I've got. But I will not live wondering if I was the only available rope to a person, and I turned you away. I just won't. My peace of mind is worth much more than all the money to me. Okay?"

"Okay."

Ward followed d'Ethiene meekly, going to the elevator and to the man's own floor. The bodyguards let them pass without raising any eyebrows, surely noticing the hand Julius had on Ward's back. Then they entered the suite, and Skye's video surveillance options ended. This was the place they had been trying to break into. The principle was the same Skye had used on Hydra through Cybertech. Once Ward connected her to any computer, she could access the data on all the computers of the d'Ethiene business. Including the one of Julius father, the renowned weapon dealer.

That was, if Ward remembered his mission well enough to proceed to that.

"I never wanted to get into a bed with you. You were right to call me out on that one. But I still like you. I like you a lot," was the last thing she got to hear from the mic before a door opened and closed in the distance, and a sound of quiet breathing was all that could be heard on the comm.

Fifteen minutes later, the light on the screens of the Bus operation room came on. Rows of numbers flashed through the monitors, then stopped, and Skye was presented with a glowing portal giving her access to the Holy Grail of the West Coast armament smuggling. She changed her seat and was readying herself when a soft voice came through the comm.

"Mission accomplished. Did it work?" The first thing she noted was that he wasn't slurring anymore. The second was how soft his voice sounded, even considering that he would want to avoid being heard.

"Yes."

"Can you please tell Talbot that and pass me my next instruction?"

He didn't sound like he was trying to talk low, more like he was exhausted and too shattered to care who could see it. He sounded like he hadn't even been close to being drunk before, and still hadn't made up one word of everything he said. And Skye didn't know what to do with that. She remembered seeing it before – the fleeting moments when he suddenly looked like he might be shattering right there, that were gone the next moment and left her unsure if she was inventing things. She had attempted to reach out to him more than once, back when he was the team protector and her S.O. She had never been successful, but she kept on trying. What should she do with him now that he was the enemy?

"Stand by," she answered levelly, picked up the phone Ward had left behind, and dialled the number for Talbot´s office.

She was starting to see why he had been so pissy at the colonel. The man had him at his beck and call, but he didn't have any infrastructure to help him out. A phone as a communications device, on an infiltration? Ward was working a level 6 mission at least without any kind of gear, of course he was mouthing off to Talbot any chance he got.  
The man answered on the second ring.

"Ward has gained access to the suite." It was a crass way to put it, but Skye had been thinking about it a little bit more, and had come to the very uncomfortable conclusion that Ward's seduction antiques could have come directly ordered by Talbot. "He is asking for further instructions."

"Tell him to stay by the target's side at all times."

"Stand by, don't leave his side," she relayed into the microphone.

"And then what?" Ward asked a little apprehensively, like she had some secret of the universe that she was choosing to withhold from him just out of spite.

"How am I supposed to know?" she snapped at him. "It's between you and your charming handler. You made that deal, now carry on."

She was almost immediately sorry for the snapping, not because he didn't deserve it (he did) but because the only reason behind it was the fact that it was easier to snap than to think about masks and faces, half-truths and half-lies, pretension and earnestness and the compassion of strangers. Strangers had it easy. Friends had the hard part. Friends could not afford the risk of mercy. SHIELD could not afford being compassionate to Hydra soldiers. Maybe some other time, but definitely not now.

***

She tried to assuage the feelings of guilt by telling Ward, not unkindly, that she was going to stop monitoring him at all times. Now that he had gained entry, a backup wasn't all that necessary. She could still contact him if his orders from Talbot changed, but she felt like giving him a bit of privacy was the way to go. Whether he had truly miscalculated the amount of alcohol or he had spontaneously broken down, she did not know. She also had a nagging voice at the back of her mind telling her that the entire conversation could have been aimed at herself as well as Ward's target. Still, Julius´s words had rung true with her. Ward could not hurt her from his actual position, and she would be damned if she became unnecessarily cruel while worrying about being conned.  
She busied herself with analyzing the network of the family. The specs of the Destroyer gun were easy to find. Some sleepy coast resort a hundred miles south of LA was the chosen destination, and May and Coulson went there in search of the weapon as soon as Skye located it.

She remotely assisted the team while they confiscated the weapon. The seaside warehouse it was hidden at had put lots of emphasis on the secrecy but invested little in the actual protection, and May easily managed to neutralize the guards. By the time afternoon had come, the team was safely in possession of the weapon and deciding how to better transport it to the Bus. Skye had spent her time electronically shadowing them, though she did communicate Ward a weirdly specific instruction to take Julius on a car ride out of town. She never got to hear how he pulled off that one; it had happened at exactly the same moment May had wanted to know about the state of the traffic on their way back and the possibility of road controls. By the time Skye had safely navigated the van through several Los Angeles police blocks and turned back to Ward's comm, she was greeted with loud cheerful music and Julius's voice enthusiastically singing off tune to the beat.

Ward's phone rang again some thirty minutes after the team had announced that they were forty minutes away from the airfield. Skye picked it rather apprehensively; Talbot scared the shit out of her without even trying, based solely on the fact at he literally had Coulson by his throat.

"Inform Ward of his last instruction. D'Ethiene should tragically die, by accident or by his own hand. I want something big, something worth opening the evening news, got it? Have him send me some pictures, then report back to base."

It is so unexpected different from what she was expecting that Skye almost put down the phone out of sheer shock. Then her brain rebooted and logic went online again.

"What?! You can't do that. You are with the military, you can't order an assassination! Who the hell do you think you are?"

"I am a person who has a formally non-existent black op operative at my beck and call. You, SHIELD missy, should not be the one to complain, it's your Agency's standard mode of operation. Or what did you think Black Ops even means? Eight o'clock news. He will get in trouble if I don't see something I like."

"You don't have any right to do it, and you can't make Ward do it! I am informing Director Coulson of this right now! And I am informing Julius. And the press. And I am…"

But there was only a steady beeping on the line, informing her that the connection had been cut off and leaving Skye shaking with adrenaline and anger. She had not expected that. The military didn't order hits on people, did they? Or was this one more case of her being the stupidly naive rookie that believed in truth serums and asked all the wrong questions?

She wanted to call Coulson and tell him everything that just happened, but she went on Ward's comm instead. Talbot had a point. She was just the messenger, and it was already well past seven o'clock. Keeping him in the dark would not do Ward any favors. She wondered briefly if this kind of thing would be enough to finally shake him out of his comfy obedience deal, but let go of the hope almost instantly. He wasn't obeying because he agreed with Talbot, or because he wanted to. It had been made abundantly clear on the Bus, and now the threat had also been clear and present, even if Skye had not understood the exact implication.

"Ward?" There was laughter and loud music, and the general sounds of a car speeding down the highway. Skye wondered if he couldn't hear her, and felt a little better for it. She used the time to call up Coulson on her other line, quickly informing him that he was to listen in, but not make a sound.

"Yeah?" said Ward just then.

"I didn't say anything," was the confused reply of Julius.

"Okay then," shrugged Ward. 

He was letting her know that he was listening to her, Skye knew. And driving. And playing really bad country music on the radio. These two had not done anything suspicious in the time Skye had been checking up on them, spending most of their time chattering in French. Julius was either making fun of Ward's accent or helping him improve it.

"Lose the company for five. You have new orders."

There were no specific words after that, just more music and the other man chatting while Ward remained as laconic as he dared without attracting attention. Soon enough, the sounds of the road became diminished and finally the motor died down.

"Need gas?"

"No, just thirsty as hell. Be right back."

"Bring me a Diet Coke."

"'Will do."

There was a sound of a door opening, Ward greeting the owner of the gas station with a grunt. He still didn't say anything to her, but Skye knew this was her opening.

"Talbot wants you to cross him off and make it look like an accident."

"Like a car crash." Talbot had wanted them to go for a ride this afternoon.

"Yeah." He didn't say anything after that. Skye heard a distinctive sound of a fridge door opening and closing. "Hey, you are not thinking about doing it, are you? Don't you even dare, Ward! He has no right to order you to do any of this crap, and you have no excuse for even considering obeying. The media will learn all about it, let me tell you. I will make sure of…"

"Skye, calm down…" That was Coulson's voice on the other comm, reasonable but tense.

"Did he mention proof?" asked Ward tiredly.

"Yes."

"Time window?"

"On the eight o'clock news, today. Talbot has something on you, hasn't he? What is it? Tell me, we'll sort this out. Just come here right now. I have Coulson on the other line; he will help too, I promise."

"His father is dying. The older brother has one too many prison stays, and Julius could never hope to lead the conglomerate. If I had to guess? The younger son made the deal. Whoever paves the way for his inheritance, gets dibs on the post-Chitauri armament development front. It's a tasty deal. No wonder Talbot feels like he must hurry. All the agencies in the world would be all over that one."

"Ward, don't you dare! I am calling the man and I am telling him to drive the hell away right now!"

"You don't have his number. And Coulson won't let you anyway. Not when interfering would signify the end of SHIELD."

Doing nothing would also signify the end of SHIELD, Skye wanted to scream. End of honesty, end of the claim of protection. She felt like crying. Some months prior, she might have. From the silence coming from Coulson´s end, he was just as powerless as she herself. Now, she just gripped the comm and swallowed.

"Ward…"

Unassuming sounds of a busy gas station were filtering through the comm, filling the empty silence of a man who was utterly and completely alone. Being made to do things he never wanted to do again. And Skye didn't know where the "again" in her thoughts had come from, but she knew it to be true. Why the hell didn't she talk to him after Garrett was shot? She had known that Ward had followed him blindly, just not why. She had thought the "why" didn't matter. Had thought that he should have stood up for himself, and the fact he didn't condemned him to everything he would get afterwards. With Talbot, she had assumed that Ward had found himself a sweet deal; he had actively implied that. But what exactly awaited him if he disobeyed, or failed his mission? Why the hell was he going through with it?

"He'll definitely want the Destroyer gun, too," he went silent for a while, then pressed on. "When he comes onto the Bus later today, stay well away from him."

There was a creak, and a sharp sizzle, and that was it. Whether he had stepped on the mic or squished it between his fingers, the device was dead. Shouting wasn't going to solve anything.

The eight o'clock news opened with the report on a deathly accident on Interstate 5, where the second son of a French steel mogul had tragically perished at the young age of twenty-nine years. Coulson and May stood staring somberly at the monitor, arms crossed in two identical positions.

"He made him do it. I don't know how, but Ward didn't want to. He liked the man. It was plain to see. Talbot made him do it," said Skye when the silence became unbearable.  
"I know," answered Coulson.

"He said Talbot..."

"I know, Skye. I heard. And I know how angry it makes you. It makes me angry too. But we don't have a choice. We came into the game too late, with absolutely no info. All we wanted was one gun, while there was a game in play for thousands of these weapons. That is what the lack of intel does to you. We weren't ready, and we won't be ready for a long time. We are nobodies right now. There was nothing we could do."

"What do we do now?"

"We carry on, and we try to do better the next time," answered May. "And we learn from this, so that we don't get played ever again."

Just as Ward had predicted, Talbot boarded the Bus shortly afterwards, once again touching down near the plane on his high tech private helicopter. There was a small army of soldiers with assault rifles hot and ready, but symbolically trained toward the ground. Nobody followed him onto the plane but that, too, was a show of power more than a show of good will from the colonel. Coulson met him in the operations room, the Destroyer gun out of sight and locked safely away in the plane cell.

"Our first ever cooperation had gone smoothly, I would say. Even if some of your people could go with a little further education in showing respect to the chain of command," he mentioned, casually nodding in Skye's direction after shaking hands with Coulson in an insincere display of respect.

"We are implementing a different philosophy this time," smiled Phil just as insincerely.  
"Well, as long as you don't have more than ten people under you, it might work. So, I have heard that you were successful in retrieving a very dangerous prototype. This technology should be off the streets. The best way to deal with it is to destroy it, and forget it even existed. I think you would be delighted to do it yourself, to atone for the fact that the old SHIELD created it in the first place... If you still had access to your Slingshot, that is. But since you don't, I am willing to do you a favor and put my own resources to good use."

May's body didn't move, but her eyes showed that her brain was screaming "Asshole!" as clear as day. Coulson didn't even bat an eye. He had clearly already imagined how the conversation would go.

"Of course. Thank you for the offer. I will be delighted to personally accompany you to the facility of your choice to supervise and confirm the destruction," he answered pleasantly. It was Talbot's turn to scowl. "Alternatively, we could avoid so many formalities. If I can personally testify to your good faith in all this, maybe I won't need to lose my time on a lengthy travel. A small but clear gesture will suffice."

"Such as?"

"Ward's leash. He is a former SHIELD agent. We will know to use him properly, and you won't have to deal with any public fallout if there is ever any… failures. I will of course be open to joint operations."

Skye's smile lit the plane. It was all she could do to avoid mouthing a "thank you" to her favorite Director. Talbot stuck his hand into the pocket of his military trousers. When he took it out again, there was a tiny and thin plastic box similar to a remote garage door opener on the palm of his hand. He waived it demonstratively in front of Coulson.

"This is what you want? Do you even know what it does? Think you have enough balls to use it?"

To his credit, Phil did not look as desperate to jump at the man's throat and take the thing from his hands as Skye felt. She did not know what the device did. She only knew how Ward had reacted to it. The way that he pounded on the cell door five minutes before his set time, the way he had sat quietly waiting for something to happen, the way he mouthed off to Talbot in a way she never, ever seen him talk to anyone else. There had been true anger there, but that was not the new part. Skye had seen Ward angry before. It was the feeling of being cornered that got her, and the way he went along after she had relayed his last orders to him.

"People like that? You need to teach them their place until they know who owns them. You need to teach them good, take the time, repeat the lesson until they know it by heart."

"What does it do?" asked May. Skye had almost forgotten that she was there, but the specialist stood her ground with her arms crossed and a dawning understanding on her face.

Talbot shook his head.

"You people broke his larynx and failed to inform on that little detail when shipping him off. His airway closed up on the way to prison. Had to be detoured into a medical facility, or die. I would have chosen the latter option, but then the list of things he could do? Worth a little detour. The doctors cleaned out the swelling, left a little something behind. He misbehaves – breathing suddenly becomes an impossible thing to do. Five minutes without oxygen is brain damage time. Most people go unconscious by two. He lasts between three and four, depending on whether he is breathing in or out the moment I hit the button."

"Give it to me, and you can have the Destroyer gun".

No talk about torture, no mention of prisoner's rights, no anger, and no visible reaction. Skye was shaking, willing to jump on Talbot's mustached face and rip it to pieces, but she could understand Coulson's quiet demeanor too. They would not get the deal by raging, and they would not set anything to rights by talking about it.

Talbot extended his hand and threw the device at Coulson.

"Make no mistake… He will act up if he is not regularly… maintained. Random reminders every couple of days work best – there is an option for that, just remember to turn it off when he is out on missions. I forgot once… Almost cost me a fucking helicopter."

Coulson took a quick look at the box before putting it away into a pocket of his jacket.  
"Thank you. If you would like to take the gun, I think we can be done here. May, if you could run the pre-flights?"

He gestured for Talbot to precede him to the containment cell where the Destroyer gun was located. May and him had packed it into a wooden crate filled with assorted rags, but it was more of an anti- curious-bystanders measure than a safety measure against the weapon itself. Skye held back, taking hold of the phone Ward had left in her care and wondering if he would maybe come back here to pick it up before heading to whatever military compound was now his base. She hoped he would. Coulson was evidently wanting to take off as soon as possible, but she hoped that he would be kind enough to destroy the thing and make sure Ward saw all the little pieces, and then… Then, she honestly did not know. All she wanted was for that thing to be destroyed. She almost felt like she was suffocating just thinking about it.

There was a sudden shout and a sound of a body hitting the floor. Skye was on her feet in a second, running through the aisle in the direction of the cell. Coulson was lying face down in front of the entrance, but he was struggling to stay up just as she approached him. Blood was streaming down his nose.

"Talbot?" she asked, eyeing the door to the cell that was now somehow closed.

"Ward," he muttered.

The door proved to have been barricaded from inside, as they discovered after a second. After calling up the video surveillance, it quickly became obvious how. The crate containing the weapon had been wedged between the table that was bolted to the floor and the door that opened inwards. Opening it now would prove impossible.

"…carbon polymer and a 5 inch thick isolation wire. It absorbs all the emissions, both originating here and coming from outside. You little gadget does not work here. Now stand up."

Ward was standing over a fallen Talbot. The colonel spat out a mouthful of blood, muttered something that the audio did not pick up and made to stand, only to feint half way up and go for Ward's kneecap. It was a damning move, high end dirty tactics like the ones May had started to show Skye so that she could turn an unfortunate situation around. After having experienced the move, Skye could already imagine Ward writhing on the floor but he just sidestepped the attack and counteracted with one on his own.

"Stand up," he repeated very quietly, the sort of calm that was so fake and forced that it only served to illustrate the real rage hidden underneath. Talbot spat out again, a string of choice expletives leaving his mouth.

"If Ward kills him, the military will blame us," noted May.

On screen, Ward was proceeding to kick the man, effectively shutting Talbot up, then kneel over him and immobilize him in a one-armed hold while patting him down with the other.

"He isn't going to kill him," said Skye. "He just wants the leash for himself. As soon as he realizes Talbot doesn't have it… Oh."

"Exactly," finished Coulson, taking the hold of the comm. "Ward, stop. Listen to me. He doesn't have the device. I do."

It didn't take long for Ward to realize that the thing he was after wasn't where he expected to find it. It was at that same time that Coulson's attempts to get his attention finally proved fruitful. Ward stood up, breathing heavily and looking up to the camera. Skye could see anger, fear, and disappointment flashing in his eyes. He had almost had it, but now the situation had gone from a sweet victory to being cornered in a box with the object he needed once again out of his reach.

"I have the device," repeated Coulson. From Ward's expression Skye could infer that he did not find that information anywhere near as calming at the director expected him to.  
"I am going to…"

Ward moved again, and there was suddenly a gun in his hand pointing directly at Talbot's forehead.

"Take off. Five thousand feet altitude in less than ten minutes, or I kill him," he uttered emotionlessly.

"Ward, wait, this is not…"

"Ten minutes, five thousand feet, or you get two dead bodies in this cell and the entire military on SHIELD´s ass forever, Coulson."

This was exactly what they had hoped he'd never realize, but now that he did he could play them against one another effortlessly. Skye could tell just how seriously Phil had taken the threat in the swiftness with which the order for May was issued. Ward´s threat was not the "bomb in my pack" spiel they had pulled off in Centipede, and Coulson did not for one moment think about challenging his heavy implication that they would both go at the first sign of foul play. If it was because Talbot had Ward kill Julius, or because Talbot had tortured him, Skye did not know, but this was very real, and there was no talking it through with Ward.

The platoon outside was not impressed by the Bus suddenly firing up its turbines and taking right off, but they would have reacted worse to the corpse of their colonel, so there was nothing for it. May announced that everybody should buckle up, which nobody was in any position to do. The ascent was so brusque, Skye's ears would not stop ringing. Several preventive shots were fired outside, but the men wouldn't fire at the plane that held their commander, and soon it all stopped.

"Altitude to be reached in seven minutes," announced May on the comms.

Skye checked to see if Ward would react, but he was just leaning against the wall, his right hand gripping the pistol. There was a heavy wind in the cell, and it took her a moment to understand that that was how Ward had gotten inside. The roof was detachable on command from the inside, and he had obviously known what to look for on the outside to crack several panels open. He had probably been planning this since realizing the cell was the one even ground he had any hope to overpower Talbot on. From the insistence that he needed backup (he had been perfectly able to run the mission himself, in the end) to offering to sleep there. For all he had looked like he had loathed the arrangement, it was the only place he had discovered to be safe.

Skye activated the comm. It emitted a little whizzing noise, and both Ward and Talbot looked up expectantly at that, probably figuring the altitude had been reached. It did give Skye pause, because she was about to say something to Ward that she did not dare to say to Talbot.

"Coulson will not risk any bloodshed," she settled on finally. It was far from what she meant, and as soon as the words had left her mouth she realized it would not be enough. "He got your choker in exchange for the Destroyer gun."

Ward smiled humorlessly while eyeing the crate.

"That is one cool weapon he could have had. Should I feel honored to be of the same value?"

"He wanted to set you free from this. He was trying to help you." She felt like he needed to hear all that before he stepped out of the cell and the situation escalated to the point where there would be no way to make it right. She desperately wanted to tell him all the obvious things, like the fact that Julius was right, that he deserved to know how long he was expected to pay, that he deserved to know if it could ever be enough. But she didn't dare with Talbot right there, and Ward wasn't a mind reader. In fact, his social skills had always been crap.

"Altitude 4000 feet," announced May´s voice over the comm.

Ward gestured at Talbot to stand up. Skye had half expected him to use any of the rags in the crate to tie him down, but he just made an aborted gesture with the weapon and waited for the colonel to push the crate out of the way.

"To the left all the way down to the cargo area, hands behind you back. And before we do this, I want you to think back on the three months you spent personally educating me, and I want you to understand just how much I want for you to give me an excuse. And Coulson? I need much less than a couple of minutes to blow his head off. Try that thing on me, and you will quickly find yourself benefactor-less."

Coulson gestured for Skye to move from where she was perched near the comm, and took control of it himself. 

"I am not going to hurt you. You can have that thing as soon as you are out." 

May was at the controls, and would remain there as per Coulson's expressed orders to avoid setting Ward off. The "thing" was lying on the table in the common room, displayed prominently enough that Ward would not miss it on his way to the cargo bay. He eyed it for a second before reaching for it and pressing the button very briefly to try it for authenticity and just as quickly letting it go.

They made their way to the cargo bay, Coulson and Skye in the lead so that Ward could always control their position and Talbot moving between the both parties as a human shield. Once in the clear, Ward made the colonel walk to the slowly opening ramp, and Skye's heart jumped into her throat at the grim possibilities of that position. Ward didn't pay the man too much heed, though, nor did he look especially interested in enjoying Talbot´s scared look. The only thing he did was get hold of one of the parachutes and toss it at the colonel. The second the chute was properly on, the man was hurling from the opened ramp down to the earth far below.

Ward looked on, made a distasteful face and occupied himself with finding the homing device of a second parachute. He was far enough from both Coulson and Skye to feel secure and leave the pistol tucked into his pants, or maybe he had just figured that as long as he had the chute in his hand he could jump off at the sight of any trouble. He had already proved that didn't need to have the thing perfectly fastened when jumping after Simmons, after all.

"We can take that implant out of you, you know," Coulson said. "There are bound to be specs for it stored somewhere, it's only a matter of time you have them on your tail again. If you stay and do your time, some day you may be free."

"I have already dealt with the specs," came the even reply. Ward had just found the beacon in the chute, hidden as it was precisely for these kind of cases. "I am already free of this mess you landed me in."

"You landed in this mess yourself when you chose to follow Garrett. Spies caught at the time of war are executed on sight."

"But I wasn't, was I? I didn't get a bullet to the head and believe me, I would have given up every secret for a quick way out."

Coulson didn't reply anything. Whether he didn't have a good enough answer to the grim implication or he simply chose to let Ward go without further ado, Skye did not know. The Director just signed and went back up the ladder to inform May that the military could start the Operation Retrieval for their fearless leader.

Skye stayed put.

"You had it all planned out," she said accusingly. He smirked, stood up and put the parachute on.

"Best marks since Romanoff."

"Including the entire thing with d´Ethienne?" That wiped the smirk off his face in a spectacular manner. Skye pressed on before he could find his balance again and turn his uncertainty into an emotion he could build upon, like anger. "You didn't truly kill him, did you? You just faked it all."

It was a possibility, wasn't it? She knew the thought had to have occurred to Ward at least once. He was already planning to come and get Talbot afterwards, and the news had shown no footage outside of the car wreck and the blocked traffic.

"I’ve killed a lot of people in the last month, Skye,” he said angrily. “What would one person even matter?” 

Skye expected him to be off then, to put an end to the uncomfortable conversation. He didn't, though. He didn't move at all, just stood there vacantly looking at the floor, and this… This wasn't uncomfortable for him, was it? It was shattering. He had been made into a soulless killing machine, and all he could do was stand there choking on that knowledge very quietly, just as he had choked on Talbot's device right in front of them all. 

“He wanted proof,” Ward went on quietly. ”He always wanted graphic proof, and I could never…” He was still looking down at the metallic floor under his feet, expression grim, but he looked up in the last moment, eyes dark and fiercely defiant, and Skye knew what he was going to say next. “Not until today.”

She grinned, proud and relieved, even if she knew that Ward was right, that Julius was only one of many. But, faked background stories or not, they had become close. The fact that the man was still alive probably explained why Talbot was, as well. Had Grant been forced to kill Julius, Skye wasn’t sure he would have held out on his revenge. And that… Say what you want about Grant Ward, he had never before killed out of gain or anger. He followed his orders, nothing more and nothing less.

“I’ll make sure that he gets IDs,” she hurried to say. “Protection. If he testifies, we could make Talbot face charges for this.”

“Don’t you dare bring SHIELD into this. They’ll only make him into a pawn again.”

They would, Skye knew. It would be Coulson´s best and only chance to get from under Talbot’s thumb. 

“All right. I’ll do it all myself. Just new ID. I promise.”

Ward nodded.

Skye found herself coming closer to him. The wind coming from the opened ramp was dreadful, and she felt light-headed enough that when she reached him, she had to hold on to the chute straps not only to steady him, but also for her own sake. And it was the measure of just how right this was, that when he put his hands around her shoulders it had the same effect for him, because he both leaned on her and sheltered her from the worst of the wind.

"You don't deserve to go free," she said, and could not tell where that had come from. From anger, probably, because he wasn't staying and he sure as hell wasn't asking forgiveness, and she wanted him to. She wanted him to so much, even as she understood why he wouldn't. Why he would never trust Coulson, why he would never want to take orders again. But she still wanted him to do all of these things. Wanted him to try and come back. Accept whatever punishment was dealt, and be done with it, and then… Then stay. Tell her the story he had told her only that morning, but this time face to face.

She looked up at him, and made him look at her in return before saying what she wanted to say next.

"But you deserve to be free. To learn what it feels like."

And that – that was so much more liberating, and just as true. It was what she knew to be right, and what she felt comfortable giving him. He nodded against her shoulder, a short movement that felt like a thank you and a promise, and just held onto her with a strength that was both desperate and humbling, scary and grounding, and she knew that whatever happened next, she had just given him something that would stay with him forever.

"Whatever you do, please don't kill again," she said after a while, not an order but a plea, and he pulled off and looked at her and nodded again so earnestly, it seemed like such a possibility was a revelation to him. Skye let go of the straps on his chest and stroked his face once, wishing to wash away the dazed expression such a tiny kindness provoked in him. He didn't pull on her - didn't dare to -, but he tugged on her free hand and Skye became aware that he was guiding her to the side of the plane so that she could safely hold on. When he walked back to the end to the ramp and paused looking back, Skye thought one last time that maybe he would choose to stay. But then she blinked and he wasn't there.

And she was okay with that, too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and commenting ;). And again, go [ here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2258196) if you've missed the art for this.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Off the Leash](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2258196) by [paynesgrey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/paynesgrey/pseuds/paynesgrey)




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